Dish Of Salt: ‘Idol’s’ Top 11 — Our Pinch-Hit Writer Breaks It Down

The Dish is on vacation this week, so for today only, I’m pinch-hit writing her column. Most days, I’m editing this column, so lucky me when late yesterday I got the e-mail that I would have two tickets to yesterday’s Top 11 taping of “American Idol.” Like Laura, I have been an “Idol” addict since season one, and I have an encyclopedic knowledge of the show’s history. And while I’m generally annoyed by this season’s crop of hopefuls (sans one, explained below), I relished the chance to see them live.

Then, I actually had to endure the pain of last night’s performances, without the luxury of my DVR. Again, with the exception of one (have I teased you enough yet?), last night’s performances were excruciatingly terrible. I mean… squirming in your seat terrible. I gave up yoga last night for this?! Alas, this is my job, and most people would kill for the opportunity to see the “Idols” sing live, right? (Awww, who am I kidding? I’m addicted to “Idol,” so even if they were a little pitchy dawg, I was gonna jump at the chance to go.)

First off, I think this was the week that the new judge line-up finally started to meld together. Maybe it was that they were united in the face of the atrocious performances, but this was the definitely the first week that Ellen seemed in her element to me. Dish has mentioned this before, but attending live, you get to witness the casual interactions of the judges (and Ryan) with audience members and with each other. Ellen is too cute, holding hands with wife Portia di Rossi during every commercial break. And she loves to talk to fans. Even Simon and Kara spent time hugging little girls and signing autographs in the audience last night. Everyone there (other celeb sightings included Gordon Ramsay & his family, as well as director Adam Shankman) seemed in a generally good mood, including ….

… Miley Cyrus, who was this week’s “Idol” “mentor.” Now, before you go bashing Miley (even my mother was saying, “She’s 17, what’s she doing mentoring?”), let me say that I’m a HUGE Miley fan. I truly believe that she’s a talented performer and song writer, so despite her young age, I think she was a great pick to work with the contestants this week. She was more of a peer to them than a traditional mentor, and even she knew that. It was a different dynamic, but I think it worked.

On to the contestants – in my book, there was Crystal Bowersox… and then there was everyone else. If ever there was any question about Crystal’s raw talent, look no further than her performance of Janis Joplin’s “Me & Bobby McGee” last night. It was LEAGUES above every other performance. I have no doubt that Crystal “should” win this season. She’s unlike any other contestant we’ve seen in the show’s history, and she’s a breath of fresh air, much like Adam Lambert was last season. However, we all know that America has a way of getting things wrong, so who knows if she actually “will” win.

My money would actually be on Michael Lynche (who the judges called “too lounge-y” last night) to win the competition at this point. I see Siobhan placing 2nd or 3rd, and Lee, Casey and Aaron fighting it out for 4th – 6th. The nice thing about the underwhelming crop of contestants this season is that the competition actually seems wide open at this point. A great — or awful — couple of performances could still change everything. And I have no doubt that Paige is going home tonight, especially with Tim Urban continuing to have the power of VoteForTheWorst.com behind him.

Last night’s theme was Billboard #1 hits. OK, on to my breakdown:

First up was Lee Dewyze, who sounded amazing live. I still think the guy thinks too much about what he’s doing on stage, but there’s no doubt his voice is great. Simon said he still hasn’t had “a moment” yet, and I agree. We’re all still waiting for that Adam-Lambert-doing-“Ring of Fire”-thing from him.

Next was Paige Miles, who butchered the Mariah Carey version of Phil Collins’ “Against All Odds.” Buh bye Paige.

Tim Urban actually didn’t sound that bad to me live (and trust me, I’ve thought he was awful every week listening from home). Again, he’ll stay a few more weeks because of VoteForTheWorst.com and because he’s cute. Simon told him, “You just have zero chance of winning right now.” Yep.

Aaron Kelly had his best week ever, singing Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing.” It sounded great live too. He’s not as cute as David Archuleta from two years ago though, so I don’t see him going further than 5th or 6th this season.

Crystal Bowersox… Janis… ‘nuff said. Again, this young mother from Ohio just knocked it out of the park. I re-watched her performance twice last night on DVR, just because I loved it so much. If there’s any justice, she’ll win this season. She says she has “something special planned” for next week. I can’t wait.

Michael Lynche stumbled a bit this week with “When a Man Loves a Woman.” He’s a star though, and he’s so charismatic. He’ll be going far this season.

I predict Andrew Garcia goes home next week. He was hanging by a thread with his version of Marvin Gaye’s “I Heard It Through The Grapevine.” He did moonwalk on stage for a second though, so props to him for that. All of the judges agreed that he’s still chasing his “Straight Up” rendition from Hollywood Week. I agree.

Young Katie Stevens had her best week yet with Fergie’s “Big Girls Don’t Cry.” Literally, it was the perfect song choice. She felt contemporary and in her element. She bought herself at least a few more weeks on the show last night.

Casey James rocked out with Huey Lewis & The News’ “The Power of Love.” Horrible song choice, but the guy is more comfortable and relaxed on stage than any other contestant this season. He actually looked like he was having fun.

The judges hated Didi Benami’s “You’re No Good” by Linda Rondstadt, but I actually enjoyed it live. I thought she pulled off the slinky, sexy thing well. Like Megan Joy from last season, she has something very unique and different about her voice. She’ll probably go home in the next few weeks though.

Siobhan Magnus ended the night with “Superstition” by Stevie Wonder. Of all of the No. 1 songs out there, I have no clue why Siobhan chose this one. I actually like Siobhan, but I think she’s over-relying on her signature “scream.” I would have loved to have seen her do Pink last night, rather than something from 1972. She looked like a rock-star last night though, complete with a mohawk. The look didn’t match the performance for me though. It wasn’t her best night this season, but she’s still completely safe.

So there you have it. Again, I predict Paige is a goner this week. Whoever goes home this week doesn’t get to go out on the “Idol” summer tour, and I don’t think audiences care to see or hear Paige live. That’s it for my “Idol” summary. The Dish will be back next week!

And In “Glee” News:

Entertainment Weekly broke the news this morning that “Glee” will come out with a Madonna-themed mini-album called “The Power of Madonna,” for their much-anticipated Madge-themed episode this spring. And the tracklisting (available April 20) is out now too!

1. Express Yourself
2. Borderline/Open Your Heart
3. Vogue
4. Like A Virgin
5. 4 Minutes
6. What It Feels Like For A Girl
7. Like A Prayer

So what do you think about the songs that they chose? I personally think it’s a great line-up and I couldn’t be more excited!

Tweet me your comments @Blacklow1